Forgotten Bob - Gotta Gimme Rockabilly!

 Forgotten Bob remains an enigma. He sings his latest song about being all about Rockabilly, and he certainly isn't the Punk Rock musician he used to be. But his loud clothes and piled up hair extends the usual image of a Rockabilly artist, such as Elvis Presley, or Carl Perkins. But as he says in this song, he's ditched all of his gaudy punk jewelry. We've been told by people that knew him back then that he had the works, spikes in his ear, nose rings, chain going from the nose ring to an earring,  and some piercings of some very private areas we'll not mention. He has changed, but he's still out there. His manager texted us and said that Bob's interest in politics has waned, probably take a break from it which is okay by us. We're interested in seeing where he goes next!

Way long ago in the day
Now to me it sounds so silly
I had somethin' diff'rent to say
Playin' loud, screamin' and shrilly

Thank God it was long time ago
Hate stuff played so willy nilly
I growed up and sing better stuff
Now I'm about ROCKABILLY!

Gotta gimme Rock a billy!
Combo of country and rock
That's become my musical role
Sure ain't no Mozart or Bach!

Got rid most of my jewelry
Still got the holes in my face it went
Studs, rings, chains and the works
Sold it to help pay my rent

Can't say I fully repent
Still like my high greasy hair
My clothes are on the wild side
But now I wear underwear (tighty whiteys!)

Gotta gimme Rock a billy!
Combo of country and rock
That's become my musical role
Sure ain't no Mozart or Bach!

Closed the door, ain't goin' back
Ain't playin' nothin' frilly
The past is just what it is
The present is ROCKABILLY!

Gotta gimme Rock a billy!
Combo of country and rock
That's become my musical role
Sure ain't no Mozart or Bach!

Way long ago in the day
Now to me it sounds so silly
I had somethin' diff'rent to say
Playin' loud, screamin' and shrilly

Thank God it was long time ago
Hate stuff played so willy nilly
I growed up and sing better stuff
Now I'm about ROCKABILLY!

Gotta gimme Rock a billy!
Combo of country and rock
That's become my musical role
Sure ain't no Mozart or Bach!

Forgotten Bob - The Smegma Rock

Forgotten Bob is no fan  of Donald Trump's administration. He pulls no punches in his criticism, and he does it to his usual rock-a-billy beat. But he goes further and criticizes the entire MAGA movement with this song, and equates it to...well...the title of the song tells that tale! If there's one thing we know about Forgotten Bob, you never know what his next offering will be. But it's seldom boring! 

I'm wonderin', what in the  hell,
'Bout all the people still supportin' him
As long as that mindset is to tell,
Chances of improvement are mighty slim...
 
They call themselves the name of futility,
An acronym for they're beliefs, it's MAGA
But in the way of politics, it really should be
What's under the foreskin of a dick...SMEGMA!
 
Since last year when I stated my case,
Laid out my thoughts of Donald Trump
Said he was a nasty turd in our punchbowl,
Gotten worse as he sits on his rump!
 
Murdered civilians, broken up families,
Shifted more money to his rich bastard kind
There is no end to his causing calamities,
And to top it all off, he's losing his mind
 
They call themselves the name of futility,
An acronym for they're beliefs, it's MAGA
But in the way of politics, it really should be
What's under the foreskin of a dick...SMEGMA!
 
His followers worship his wrinkled little cock
And think that'll "affect them all but me"
So busy dancing to the smegma rock
That they really don't want to try and see!
 
Is there any hope that we will survive?
Each day it's getting worse and worse
Will there be a change to keep us alive
Or are we stuck in the gear of reverse?
 
They call themselves the name of futility,
An acronym for they're beliefs, it's MAGA
But in the way of politics, it really should be
What's under the foreskin of a dick...SMEGMA!
 
We're in a goddam war he said wouldn't happen,
His defenders don't give a shit that he lied,
It's true every time his lips start to flappin',
He could not tell the truth if he tried!
 
Ain't true that nothin' can possibly be done!
If Republicans work with Democrats to pass
Working together, fights can be won
But the Elephant has turned into a cowering ass!
 
King Donald, much more radiant than Christ
His followers pray to him and offer thanks
While everything gets so damned overpriced
And the economy continues to tank
 
Trump probably won't ever be held accountable,
 He'll die first. But every one of his opportunistic
Smegma helpers need to be held accountable for
 Their part in the endless cooperation in the corruption
 Of THE TURD IN THE PUNCHBOWL!
With a special nod to his butt boy, toy soldier
WHISKEY PETE! And let the truth contained in
The Epstein files condemn his memory as a
FUCKER OF CHILDREN...FOREVER!

Forgotten Bob - What In The Hell, Kash Patel!

Forgotten Bob continues his onslaught of the Trump Administration and the department leaders he appointed. Kash Patel ,the director of the F.B.I. is the current subject. The song is a classic rocker with a sax player that wails some solos. We called Bob's manager, a guy that goes by the name of Bodacious Marlin that everybody calls BM for short, to see if he could find out the name of the sax player to give him credit on the record. He got in contact with Bob and Bob told him that the guy goes by the name of Slobberin' Blowhard, and that he would rather not be named on the recording, as Slobber doesn't want any publicity because of his past... The more we get involved with Forgotten Bob, the more we think we're getting our collective leg pulled! But what the hell, the music is interesting.  

What in the hell, Kash Patel
Ever thought much about it?
Only reason you got the job
Put yer lips on his ass and kissed it!

A pledge of total loyalty
Of that you all are behooved
Even tried to start some shit
Even before you were approved

Vowed to bring to justice all
The enemies of Dear Donald
Man, that's a hell of a list,
It include Ronald McDonald?

What in the hell, Kash Patel
Ever thought much about it?
Only reason you got the job
Used yer hand to try and stroke it!

Teamed up with Stephen Miller
Over immigration
Be careful who ya hitch up with
You'll be in a situation

This bunch in charge of the place
Are prone to ICE aggression
Any shade darker than whitey
May be subject to deportation

What in the hell, Kash Patel
You say yer a citizen?
Better blow Trump's bugle harder
Arrest has happened to dozens of 'em!

Yer the head of the FBI
Workin' with the Blondie lady
Need to change the name to FBC
To FEDERAL BATSHIT CRAZY!

You better pray Trump don't drop dead
You'll be fucked for a change yerself
Won't nobody trust your ass now
When the next asshole comes off the shelf

Forgotten Bob - The Turd In The Punchbowl

 We are proud to debut the work of a new artist; Forgotten Bob! We wonder sometimes about a few of our associates and the venues they haunt to find some of these musicians. Forgotten Bob is a mystery as far as his family background and origins, but he's got a musical history that's long and varied. We'll let our associate that found him tell about it:

 I like to haunt dark-lit, out of the way, obscure places where music is played. Bar and grills, dives, holes in the wall, you name it and I've probably been  there or heard about it.  I found the dump that Forgotten Bob was playing in purely by accident. It was down a dark alley, with but one dim, bare bulb lighting the doorway with a sign on it that read:

FREETHINKING ADULTS ONLY! 

Well that was enough for me! There was a few tables in front of a battered bar with an old lady bartender. Men were sitting at the bar, couples at the tables.  The place was dimly lit, save for a small platform at the end of the room. There was a small band tuning up, a bass, drums, keyboard, a guitarist, and an other guitarist at the microphone giving the pitch. He was an older guy, a little weather-beaten. I could tell he'd been playing guitar for a long, long time by the look of his hands; signs of arthritis in his finger joints that had big knots. It took them a log time to tune up, as the guy at the mic kept cussing the others out for not being in tune. Finally, the drummer counted them down and they started. I admit I was surprised to hear what came out; a tight band playing in strict time, with the bass guitar laying down a solid beat. The guy at the mic had a voice that you could tell had been well used, but he sang well enough, and the first song he did was this one - THE TURD IN THE PUNCH BOWL. Well, I liked the performance and the song, so between sets I introduced myself to the band. The only one that spoke was Bob. I asked him what the deal was with the Forgotten Bob business, and he said he used to be heavy into the Punk Rock scene years ago, retired to have a family, and when his eight (!) kids were all grown he decided to try and get back into the business. He couldn't handle the punk scene anymore, and told me there ain't nothin' sadder than a geriatric punk! So he started a band to play whatever they wanted. Rock, Rockabilly, Country, right down the line. He wears his hair really long and piled on top his head. Must take a can or two of hairspray to keep it there because he really moves when he sings! He kept up his chops the whole time he was retired, and he's good!

And that's the low down. Forgotten Bob gave our associate the picture of him we've used. He said an artist friend did it for him.

 Never before in our history
A convicted felon got the position
Look up grifter in the dictionary
You'll see his picture, no definition

In the crystal punch bowl of our land
Trump's made a plop like a big ol' TURD
Don't know if his actions we can stand
Or if the country can live past his words

Has lots of trouble making up his mind
First his thoughts are down, then they are up
But I think his problem you will find
He's really got no mind to make up

In the crystal punch bowl of our land
Trump bobs and floats like a big ol' TURD
Don't know if his actions we can stand
Or if the country can live past his words

He uses the office to sell his merch
Like bit coin and imported bibles
Perfume that smells like body stench
Books of wisdom that are just libels

In the crystal punch bowl of our land
Trump taints the punch like a big ol' TURD
Don't know if his orders we can stand
Or if the country can live past his words

How in hell did he survive his past?
Well, had plenty of help in that regard
Could've got rid of him in the past
But his party just saved the retard

He was out of office, steeped in limbo
And his party years later saved him again
With his views and mouth still akimbo
Still got elected to office again!

In the crystal punch bowl of our land
Trump fouls the punch like a big ol' TURD
Don't know if his orders we can stand
Or if the country can live past his words

Don't drink none a that there punch!
It tastes like SHIT!
How can we get past the asshole?
How can we get past the asshole?
How can we get past the asshole?