The Burgoo Boys featuring Uncle June's Jug Band - The Hillbilly Tango

The Burgoo Boys featuring Uncle June's Jug Band has branched out into the Argentinean Tango with their song The Hillbilly Tango. How does a bluegrass country band come about to writing and playing a tango? Uncle June himself tells of the genesis of the idea:

The two groups went together and bought an old barn and converted it into a place we can all hang out, rehearse, and come up with ideas. We've got an excellent accordion player that also plays other jug band instruments, and we've been thinking of ideas for songs he can play the accordion on, as he's not played it on a recording yet. His training was on the accordion when he was a kid, and like a lot of accordion students, he made his way through polkas aplenty, as well as some tangoes. One day he was noodling around, and playing snatches of improvised tango tunes. Now The Burgoo Boys original band has a top-notch banjo player, and he began to 'jam' with the accordion, and we liked the sound of it! We put our heads together and come up with the idea for The Hillbilly Tango!

Uncle June takes on the solo vocalizing in the song, and he's become the main vocalist for the group, but they plan on spotlighting some of the other members who have fine voices as well.  Uncle June and John Henry Flort, the two leaders of the combined group, want everyone to have a say in things, and they say so far it's working out great. On the rare occasions when they can't reach agreement, they hold a vote. It's rare for a group that has this many members  The Burgoo Boys have 6 members, Uncle June's group varies from a core group of 5 members to as many as 15 with other players employed for added instruments. 

With the warming of the earth and the passing of the winter
Our hearts start to fill with mirth and our minds are filled with laughter
It has been a long time comin' this renewal time of year
And we'll git the banjo strummin’ and awaken our sleepy ears!
 
Singin' the bluegrass tango, dancin' the steps as we go
No time for blues for hummin' hold on tight let's go!
Hillbilly band plays the tango, ain't so strange, not at all
We like all kinds of music, and sang it in a southern drawl!
 
At first we git some strange looks when we play in a tango beat
But we think Argentinean sound is really funky and neat
So we'll play it when we got the urge whether folks understand or not
With the beat that's so familiar the boys will nail on the spot!
 
Singin' the bluegrass tango the steps begin to flow
In and out with the music hold on tight let's go!
Hillbilly band plays the tango, dang, they can do it so well!
We like all kinds of music the tango weaves its spell
 
Hillbilly meets the tango play it subtle, play it proud
Swing the beat like it should, don't play it too loud
Blend the different styles into a brand new genre
Sync with the sound, maybe reach nirvana
 
Singin' the bluegrass tango, tones played sweet and low
In and out with the music played with pick and bow
Hillbilly band plays the tango, try it with yer partner
No need to pigeonhole or be a musical martyr 

The Nude Polka Kings - Pig Fat

Pigs and the resultant products made from them have been feeding people for a long time. The old
saying goes that the only part of the pig not used is the oink, and that's more true than not. Pigs are one of  the easiest of animals to raise for meat, and they really are not dirty animals. The only reason they wallow in  the mud is to cool off when the weather's hot as they cannot sweat. 

So it stands to reason with all the pluses of raising pigs, they would be part of the cultural history of many different reasons. Jewish and Islamic cultures shun pork as it is considered unclean, but for many people pork remains an important source of protein. Certain cuts and methods of preparation can make it a healthy meat to eat as well. Then there's the subject of this song - pig fat!

Some of the most popular kinds of pork products to eat are sausage and bacon, both highly processed meats that are high in sodium and cholesterol that should be eaten in moderation, if at all. But it's true, there's a lot of flavor in pork fat! 

Their song Pig Fat is a departure for the group, as it really isn't a Polka, if it's even any kind of dance at all is the question. It would be difficult indeed to dance to the song. The group obviously had a good time recording it! 

We’ve heard about pigs in a polka, 
A most disgusting thought. 
Nothing against pigs at all 
Many a pig we have sought.
 
 But not to put in a polka, 
But a very different fate
 Butcher ‘em up 
And put ‘em on a plate! 
 
We like all the parts of a hog 
Nothing that we’d give to the dog
 But many times we’ve had a major spat, 
Over our favorite PIG FAT! 
 
Pig fat around pork chops, 
Makes them juicy and tender. 
Pig fat laced in bacon, 
Succulent and tender 
 
Clogging up our arteries
 And making us obese. 
But it really is quite tasty, 
Give us more if you please! 
 
 Pig fat is king! Pig fat is rich! 
Give us some more, or we will surely bitch!
 Fry our eggs in bacon grease, makes them mighty fine! 
We’ll take it oozing bacon grease, every time! 
 
Dripping down our chins, 
Covering our hands 
Barbecued pork ribs, 
Greasy smoked hams 
 
Pie crust made with lard, 
Is the best in the land 
Pork roast dripping fat
 Is something we can stand! 
 
 Greasy pork chops with thick fat, 
Cooked with kraut and biscuits! 
Soaks up all the deliciousness 
Please make it just for us! 
 
Sausages made with pork, 
Larded with piggie fat. 
Served on a crusty bun 
With mustard is where it's at! 
 
Pork steak fried with onions 
Is a dish fit for royalty 
But don't waste it on them 
Give it instead to ME!
 
 Pig fat is king! Pig fat is rich! 
Give us some more, or we will surely bitch!
 Fry our eggs in bacon grease, makes them mighty fine! 
We’ll take it oozing bacon grease, every time! 
 
 Cholesterol skyrockets, 
Doctor gives us hell 
Wants to start a treatment 
Giving the hard sell 
 
Pills I will surely take, 
Exercise as well, 
But cut out pig fat.... 
Ain't no way in hell! 
 
Pig fat is rich! Pig fat is king! 
Greasy sloppy pig fat, is our special thing!
I will keep on saying, until my dying breath.... 

PIG FAT! 

Pasquale Appassionato - The Pushcart Disaster

 


GR50 Records associates and agents have been busy investigating new talent, and they've found this operatic tenor! He's classically trained, and has a penchant to record off-beat songs, so he fits right in! Pasquale Appassionato is most likely a pseudonym, but we don't care. We look at the song and quality of the recording. An orchestra backs up the singer as he tells a tale of having a vegetable fight with his rival in 1920's New York Little Italy.


Picture in your mind a hot, steamy day in New York City in the 1920's. There are fruit and vegetable peddlers pushing their carts full of good to sell. Pasquale's cart is laden with all kinds of goods, it's been a good year in his garden. He has to sell as much as he can, as the items are dead-ripe and won't last much longer in the heat and humidity. He begins to shout his sales pitch over the other peddlers as he weaves his way through the crowds on the cobblestones of Mulberry Street. He hears his rival 'Big Mike' shouting, but Big Mike is shouting about how Pasquale's melons are bad, and other slurs. People hear, and quit buying anything from Pasquale. He tries lowering prices, but Big Mike has ruined his day. Now he'll have to take the loss from his produce spoiling! He gets close to Big Mike's cart, and Pasquale loses his temper, rams his cart into Big Mike's, and begins throwing his produce at Big Mike and anyone else that gets in the way! But there's one 'customer' that likes Pasquale's wares, and gives his approval!

My name is Pasquale Appassionato,
I grow the vegetable I grow la frutta
Cobblestones on Mulberry street are
baking like oven. Air is thick
Flies, they buzz...And a my produce...
 
My beautiful eggplant, they weep
 in the New York shade!
Bellissima zucchini,  they
sweat like my brow!
Tomato, she is ripe, Garlic she sigh.
La frutta, they get all slimy snotty!
I must push cart on the street
If nobody buys, my heart she
break like stale biscotti!
Mama mia... we are DOOMED!
 
Hey! Look-a here, look-a here, step right up!
Put a dime in my pocket, a pear in you cup!
I got a the garlic, the onion, the bean,
The finest tomato you ever have seen!
Hey, lady! Don’t walk, don't pass me by,
Buy a nice banana for your favorite guy!
Presto, andiamo, look at the price,
Buy it today it's allso nice!
 
But the sun is beating, the street is a mess,
 Pasquale is starting to feel the stress!
Down on the corner stands "Big Mike,"
Selling his cabbages off of a pike!
He yells to the crowd that my melons, they bad!
Making the people of Mulberry mad!
He steal  my business, taking my dime,
Ruining Pasquale's beautiful time!
 
My blood, she is boiling! My face, she is red!
I scream at Big Mike till I wake up the dead!
"You insult my fruit?! You insult my name?!"
I put on the brakes and I get in the game!
I pull back my handles, I line up the wheels,
Ignoring the women and all of their squeals—
I run at his stand like a runaway train,
CRASH! Go the carts in the alleyway lane!
 
"Basta! You no want? I give a it to you anyway!"
Flying tomato! Caught in the ear!
Splat on a the copper! Out  my way, dear!
Head of a lettuce goes spinning in flight,
Turning the corner into a fight!
Carrots so orange, nice and a sweet
I hope they make you slip, trip up you feet!
Cabbage for Big Mike! Hit in the nose!
Hit a him hard,  blood runs and flows!
Slimy and snotty, it's raining a peach,
Samples for everyone, samples for each!
 
You get a garlic! You get a bean!
Maddest banana you ever have seen!
Smash the pushcart! Break the stand!
Welcome to beautiful New York land!
 
...Eh. The horse, he like-a the carrot.

Forgotten Bob - Gotta Gimme Rockabilly!

 Forgotten Bob remains an enigma. He sings his latest song about being all about Rockabilly, and he certainly isn't the Punk Rock musician he used to be. But his loud clothes and piled up hair extends the usual image of a Rockabilly artist, such as Elvis Presley, or Carl Perkins. But as he says in this song, he's ditched all of his gaudy punk jewelry. We've been told by people that knew him back then that he had the works, spikes in his ear, nose rings, chain going from the nose ring to an earring,  and some piercings of some very private areas we'll not mention. He has changed, but he's still out there. His manager texted us and said that Bob's interest in politics has waned, probably take a break from it which is okay by us. We're interested in seeing where he goes next!

Way long ago in the day
Now to me it sounds so silly
I had somethin' diff'rent to say
Playin' loud, screamin' and shrilly

Thank God it was long time ago
Hate stuff played so willy nilly
I growed up and sing better stuff
Now I'm about ROCKABILLY!

Gotta gimme Rock a billy!
Combo of country and rock
That's become my musical role
Sure ain't no Mozart or Bach!

Got rid most of my jewelry
Still got the holes in my face it went
Studs, rings, chains and the works
Sold it to help pay my rent

Can't say I fully repent
Still like my high greasy hair
My clothes are on the wild side
But now I wear underwear (tighty whiteys!)

Gotta gimme Rock a billy!
Combo of country and rock
That's become my musical role
Sure ain't no Mozart or Bach!

Closed the door, ain't goin' back
Ain't playin' nothin' frilly
The past is just what it is
The present is ROCKABILLY!

Gotta gimme Rock a billy!
Combo of country and rock
That's become my musical role
Sure ain't no Mozart or Bach!

Way long ago in the day
Now to me it sounds so silly
I had somethin' diff'rent to say
Playin' loud, screamin' and shrilly

Thank God it was long time ago
Hate stuff played so willy nilly
I growed up and sing better stuff
Now I'm about ROCKABILLY!

Gotta gimme Rock a billy!
Combo of country and rock
That's become my musical role
Sure ain't no Mozart or Bach!

Amos Carter - Slew Foot Stu Boogie

  Amos Carter's latest tells the tale about one of his band members; Stu Milligan, rhythm guitar player.
At least a certain part of Stu's anatomy, mainly his slew feet. Now being slew footed means your toes point out towards the side, the opposite of pigeon toes where the toes point inwards. Stu's had the nickname Slew Foot for a long time, since he was in the Army. He takes it with good humor, and even contributed to the writing of this song, Slew Foot Stu's Boogie. Amos told us Stu came up with the chorus for  the song. Amos and his band keep adding to their original songs they can play at their gigs, as well as doing numerous covers. Amos handles the double bass and lays down a solid bass to the song as usual. 

We've got a member of the band 
Who walks in his own special style 
Toes stickin' out past his ankles 
His feet flomp and stomp down the aisle 
 
His toes always catching on things 
We all call him bunches of names 
Feet like two extended wings 
He was born that way, not to blame 
 
Slew foot Stu, struttin' down the hall 
Like a duck, with turned out feet 
Like Chaplin in a silent flick 
All with a boogie woogie beat 
 
He plays the rhythm guitar well 
Keeps a real steady boogie beat 
Nothin' throws him off you can bet 
Just glad he don't play with his feet! 
 
 Imagine his hands stickin' out 
Like a couple two by four boards 
He'd have hell of a time strummin' 
And couldn't finger no dang chords! 
 
Slew foot Stu, struttin' down the hall 
Like a duck, with turned out feet 
Like Chaplin in a silent flick 
All with a boogie woogie beat 
 
When Stu went into the army 
He was issued boots normal size 
He made his platoon sargent mad 
Kept wearin' out the boot sole sides! 
 
Sargent hollered at him always 
He'd yell at him when marchin' "HALT! 
Point your damn feet straight!" he'd tell him 
Stu would mutter 'It ain't my fault!" 
 
Slew foot Stu, struttin' down the hall 
Like a duck, with turned out feet 
Like Chaplin in a silent flick 
All with a boogie woogie beat 
 
All the ribbin' is in good fun 
Great that Stu's got a real thick hide 
Glad that he laughs, doesn't get mad 
He takes it all well in his stride 
 
But he gets even with some us
Givin' his own kind of abuse 
Those got pigeon toes he tells 'em 
 "Best put some bird food in them shoes!" 
 
Slew foot Stu, struttin' down the hall 
Like a duck, with turned out feet 
Like Chaplin in a silent flick 
All with a boogie woogie beat


El Gato! - Delfina El Tango

Delfina

The latest from our tango band based in Buenos Aires, Argentina! El Gato himself is the soloist in a passionate tango about his love, Delfina, who happens to be a member of the band! As it usually goes with the band, they played for about 30 minutes to warm up, and they got in a groove, sounded great! El Gato joined them and did a sound check. His voice was still rough, but seemed to have a lighter quality here and there. When they got down to it, they recorded numerous takes of the song. El Gato listened, and picked the best one, the one included. Spanish lyrics and English translation:

Delfina El Tango

Delfina, te vi pasar con tu paso de salón
y yo, torpe de verdad, pisé tarde el corazón
Tengo manos de ladrón para el aire, para el hilo
pero al verte, mi canción se me quiebra sin escondite
 
Yo no sé girar contigo me tropiezo al respirar
si me acerco, pierdo el pulso si me alejo, duele más
Y aunque digan que es destino yo te miro y ya está
 
Delfina, mi voz te baila Delfina, mi voz te da
Yo no bailo el tango, amor pero te sé cantar
Delfina, mi voz te baila (Delfina) Delfina, mi voz te da (mi voz te da)
 
Tengo el pulso de un reloj que se cae al despertar
y tu risa, por favor, me enseña a no desafinar
No te ofrezco una esquina ni un compás para los pies
te ofrezco esta herida donde te nombro otra vez
 
Si la pista me perdona yo me quedo en el borde
con la pena en la garganta y tu nombre de norte
Que me vean tan sincero que me oigan temblar
 
Delfina, mi voz te baila Delfina, mi voz te da
Yo no bailo el tango, amor pero te sé cantar
Delfina, mi voz te baila (Delfina) Delfina, mi voz te da (mi voz te da)
 
Si la noche pide una vuelta yo la doy sin caminar
porque en cada nota abierta te me vuelvo a acercar
Y si nunca hay dos cuerpos marcando el mismo lugar
que mi pecho haga el baile que mis labios sepan dar
 
Delfina, mi voz te baila Delfina, mi voz te da
Yo no bailo el tango, amor pero te sé cantar
Delfina, mi voz te baila (Delfina) Delfina, mi voz te da (mi voz te da)
Delfina, quédate aquí en mi forma de cantar


Delfina's Tango

Delfina, I saw you pass by with your ballroom stride
and I—truly clumsy—stepped on my own heart too late
My hands are like a thief's when grasping at air or thread
but when I see you, my song breaks within me, with nowhere to hide
 
I don't know how to spin with you I stumble just to breathe
If I draw near, I lose my pulse If I pull away, it hurts even more
And though they say it's destiny I simply look at you, and that is all
 
Delfina, my voice dances for you Delfina, my voice gives itself to you
I don't dance the tango, love but I know how to sing for you
Delfina, my voice dances for you (Delfina) Delfina, my voice gives itself to you (my voice gives itself)
 
My pulse is like a clock that tumbles down upon waking
and your laughter—oh, please— teaches me how not to sing off-key
I don't offer you a street corner nor a rhythm for your feet
I offer you this wound where I speak your name once again
 
If the dance floor forgives me I'll stay right here on the edge
with sorrow lodged in my throat and your name as my guiding star
Let them see how sincere I am let them hear me tremble
 
Delfina, my voice dances for you Delfina, my voice gives itself to you
I don't dance the tango, love but I know how to sing for you
Delfina, my voice dances for you (Delfina) Delfina, my voice gives itself to you (my voice gives itself)
 
If the night calls for a turn I'll take it without moving my feet
for in every open note I draw close to you once more
And if two bodies never mark out the very same spot
then let my heart perform the dance that my lips know how to give
 
Delfina, my voice dances for you Delfina, my voice gives itself to you
I don't dance the tango, love but I know how to sing for you
Delfina, my... My voice dances for you (Delfina)
 Delfina, my voice gives itself to you (my voice gives itself to you)
Delfina, stay here within the way I sing

 

Forgotten Bob - The Smegma Rock

Forgotten Bob is no fan  of Donald Trump's administration. He pulls no punches in his criticism, and he does it to his usual rock-a-billy beat. But he goes further and criticizes the entire MAGA movement with this song, and equates it to...well...the title of the song tells that tale! If there's one thing we know about Forgotten Bob, you never know what his next offering will be. But it's seldom boring! 

I'm wonderin', what in the  hell,
'Bout all the people still supportin' him
As long as that mindset is to tell,
Chances of improvement are mighty slim...
 
They call themselves the name of futility,
An acronym for they're beliefs, it's MAGA
But in the way of politics, it really should be
What's under the foreskin of a dick...SMEGMA!
 
Since last year when I stated my case,
Laid out my thoughts of Donald Trump
Said he was a nasty turd in our punchbowl,
Gotten worse as he sits on his rump!
 
Murdered civilians, broken up families,
Shifted more money to his rich bastard kind
There is no end to his causing calamities,
And to top it all off, he's losing his mind
 
They call themselves the name of futility,
An acronym for they're beliefs, it's MAGA
But in the way of politics, it really should be
What's under the foreskin of a dick...SMEGMA!
 
His followers worship his wrinkled little cock
And think that'll "affect them all but me"
So busy dancing to the smegma rock
That they really don't want to try and see!
 
Is there any hope that we will survive?
Each day it's getting worse and worse
Will there be a change to keep us alive
Or are we stuck in the gear of reverse?
 
They call themselves the name of futility,
An acronym for they're beliefs, it's MAGA
But in the way of politics, it really should be
What's under the foreskin of a dick...SMEGMA!
 
We're in a goddam war he said wouldn't happen,
His defenders don't give a shit that he lied,
It's true every time his lips start to flappin',
He could not tell the truth if he tried!
 
Ain't true that nothin' can possibly be done!
If Republicans work with Democrats to pass
Working together, fights can be won
But the Elephant has turned into a cowering ass!
 
King Donald, much more radiant than Christ
His followers pray to him and offer thanks
While everything gets so damned overpriced
And the economy continues to tank
 
Trump probably won't ever be held accountable,
 He'll die first. But every one of his opportunistic
Smegma helpers need to be held accountable for
 Their part in the endless cooperation in the corruption
 Of THE TURD IN THE PUNCHBOWL!
With a special nod to his butt boy, toy soldier
WHISKEY PETE! And let the truth contained in
The Epstein files condemn his memory as a
FUCKER OF CHILDREN...FOREVER!

Chuck Wagon Calhoun - Number Twenty Two

Chuck Wagon Calhoun appears again! This time he thinks he’s found the ultimate winning hand in Carson City, Nevada. After trying his luck as...